Behavior

Nature and Nurture

Nature.  It's a thing.  I have seen compelling evidence that there are core behaviours that are almost, if not impossible, to eradicate (or even change).  At the same time, I have seen people learn and make changes to those behaviours to make themselves better.

So which is it, nature or nurture?

The truth is, it's both.  Just imagine, there is you as a completely clean slate.  The you that you would have become without any external interaction.  Then there is the you as you were raised, being nurtured by those around you.  And finally, there is the you that you have cultivated through hard work and discipline.  There are the layers of yourself, and they are all you - creating a new layer does not eliminate the previous one.

This is from my experience, and how I have seen it work.  Comment below if you have seen differently.

In the workplace, we do our best to collaborate with others and do the greatest good.  Normally we do this with our cultivated selves, but as stress rises, we revert to deeper, more ingrained versions of ourselves, bringing out our nurtured side.  If things get worse, we can be stripped away of that nurture, and revert to nature, where our flight and fight instincts take over.

As an example, you have a co-worker who is treating people poorly at work.  You address the situation directly, explaining why their behaviours are unacceptable.  Over the next several months you see they have improved, as they have taken your feedback to cultivate themselves.  Then, a stressful situation arises, putting a project of theirs into jeopardy, and at once, they seem to revert to their old selves.  People don't react well to this, so this person's career is put into jeopardy, and they fall into a state of fight or flight, relying on their nature, further compromising the situation.

As a leader, if you begin to see this kind of behaviour, what can you do?  The employee would prefer to be their cultivated selves, but they've slipped.  Can you stop the descent?  Can you forgive actions that you know were caused by stress, bringing out potentially unwanted behaviours, or would you try to remove them from the situation?

There is no right answer.  Sometimes people can be helped, and sometimes not, but we need to remember that we are all human, and with the right trigger, we too can be stripped down to nature.

-Alexander C. Cook MEng, MBA, PEng, PMP

p.s. Nature is not a bad thing, depending on their nurture and cultivation, a person's nature may be their best and truest self, or their very worst.

 

Image Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2016/06/20/onion-health-benefits_n_10572060.html